[[Rock it :D*]]
it's the end of the day in an hour's time.
today is kinda a messed up day.
a day to set out my thoughts and get reaedy for next week.
a week pass by too rapidly,
a year will eventually sliped past my fingers
and o's will be over.
i sum up the whole day.
-bad day
-moody
-emo
-cried 1/3 of the day away. [ mainly emoing and watching drama in the evening ]
realised ; learnt ; found
- compromise, why should i? cause that's how's life is. only positive and positive would end up having a postive result.
- Not to take minior things into too much of consideration, there are things way worse than what's happening now. and i'll face it in the future or idk when... -.-
- type out, write out, get whatever is on my mind out on a paper/ wordpad, practically anywhere , and re read the entire thing. If it's really outta something i could handle, find jie or jer, or talk nicely to whoever it may concern.
BUT .. i would still prefer not having to feel so DISTANT where i have to think of all this things.
help me get pass will you? aint that what friends are for?? i guess not bah...
PS/ LALALALA, that's it for today.
ps// wow, it's sure tiring ; MY KNUCKLES HURTS @<&%$#@@KU!!!
She told me something when i said, Jer losing contact with someone close to you is scary ;[... imagine strangers ... ah i'm dieing. Labels: crazy day, Emo, Hilarious, JER's conver, PIL
[ i was really scared okay. hide in blanket -.- not something anyone would imagine me doing ]
jer; cause you're tired. treasure something while you can before you lose it. Some people never done so only till they can never see the person again. abit stupid right? that's humans. 8] go sleep bah.
ANDDDD... tadah i'm alright. it's true i'm tired...
i'm woke up refreshed,
just that i'm so pissed off in the morning because the house is so messy.
woke up bang my head cause mum never put back something she took out.
then walk into toilet step one somee... ' swimming pool drain thingy' and triped.
TOE freaking pain T-T
and the day is longgggg sia.
Somemore got P.E sia.
can't help but feel pissed off.
BUT... guess what?
thrusday is over alreadyyyyyy. =D
and here comes friday in about 50 mins.
S.S is crazyyyyy with shao reminding us of WHAT josephine said last week,
when i ask the same question today.
Shao keep laugh then Josephine gave the 'wahlao' look.
HAHAHA.
oh someone is missing me. i caught 1111 again. ;] just sms-ed viv. she may have decided to sleep instead of do maths -.- whatever.
Now, where was i?
oh, er... after S.s is maths and i went to put back in homeroom 1st.
went to change because recess talk till forget to change into uni.
go back classroom found that entire class went to library instead ..
and 3I was there.
MR Tang like super shocked to see me there lorh.
'' gwyneth , this is my class not your class ''
'' ya i knowww....*desperate* i came to take my bag ;O ''
Yuzhen, wanying, Maomao[ kester ] was there sia.
maomao told me that my bag is still there.
AND 3I MORON THREW MY BAG ON THE FLOOR AND TOOK MY DESK. __
nvmm... then josephine still can there chitchat worhs. ROFL.
Chiong-ed out of classroom cause we're late.
went to library and class had already started.
FUCK lorh. KNN la, jia and nut not leave place for me sia.
nvm, went to take chair and sit diagonally -.-
GUESS WHAT...
somehow.. my SKIRT SPLIT.
wth lorh. X-x
told nutnut and panicked.
THONG stare at me cause i was talking -.-
then end up writing a conver in my book.
and on the account that i was talkinggg and interupting his class,
HE TOLD ME TO GO UP AND WRITE THE ANSWER ON THE WHITEBOARD.
me; '' MR THONGGGGGG.. CAN U CALL SOMEONE ELSEEE * FREAK OUT* ''
and he was like ' you go call someone else' ,
Out of desperation, i ask josephine S.O.S
my table de everyone was like stare at me why dun wan to go up.
Thong was like saying ' see la, talk talk talk dunno answer then dun wan go up'
wth lorh, YOU call me how to go upppp T-T
somemore the questions are like super easy to do.
let him like that scold, very bu shuang sia.
nutnut and suranthi covered me,
and i went out.
my bag very far from them,
and min walked past,
asked me acc me to toilet and change back into P.E -.-
was not the last to enter class.
NUTNUT went looking for me and ended up late for class,
as she say she will acc me to go toilet at 1st,
but i went missing.
SO SORRRRRRY... T-T
DNT was HILARIOUS.
we sat in a circle and think of ideas for shao...
then they take 2 books.
not fun de.
then after awhile,
i went to take one titled '' japnese 'UN'useless inventions ''
SUPER HORRIBLE OKAY.
a mask which can let u smoke 10 cigarettes at one time.
OMGGGGG HORRENDOUS HAHAHHAA.
sorry shao, keep use your word =x
laugh till end of lesson.
IT's the only thing that make me laugh so much this week.
ROFL.
DNT ENDED AT 330.
However, school is not over yet. ' where in the hell is my cca ' i went to 1st floor and found sec 1s and 2s FARMING... or should i say gardening? Wanying's EXTRAAA de neighbour told me that they are in the classroom 2nd floor. Nobody in class except for teachers. MS Teng told me go 3rd floor the com lab find them. Went there and found WINNIE Lim, and was told that they were at 2nd floor. AFTER A LONG TRIP AROUND THE SCHOOL, i finally found them -.- Yuzhen was doing someeee... poster thingy and tadahhh, i went there and finish everything at one go.
PRO right ;DDDD wanted to use photoshop, but didnt. SOMEONE beside us mian xiang use photoshop when she dunno how to. HAHAHAHA. *points and laugh* okay i'm mean. =D
and when school finally ended,
bus-ed home and felt very hungry.
didnt eat lunch what...
ate butter cake, drink 2 cups of milk, SLEEEEEEP.
mum woke me at 9 pm. and i went out to eat dinner
and watch the KOREAN DRAMA mum was watching.
quite nice la, but it's starting to become a tragedy. -.-
at 1030, I went to check homework and found that i had none.
came out to blog about my day.
i kinda leaveeeee some EMO stuffs that i had thought about and i wanna write.
you can also say it's some Points in Life that i've thought of.
forget it, i'll write next time =D
and for now, i shall talk to ariel =D
ps/ I'll get some sleep when i started emoing.
ps// I can't live my life without you. ;]
'I HATE YOU TO THE CORE, cause u made me felt this way.' Labels: Daily Tots, Emo
freak, i hate feeling this way.
STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID.
if i were to go punching the wall like i use to,
i'm suppose to have broken my fingers by now.
i've never hated anyone this much.
THIS IS STUPIDITY.
i'm angry cause i'm freaking far.
cause it's super howwwww things could go in life.
WHY SHOULD I CARE WHY SHOULD I CARE,
WHY SHOUD I LISTEN,
WHY AM I GETTING ANGRY.
oh this just sux.
+59+/*-49+41*-4*-+49+...
I SHOULD REALLY CONTROL MYSELF.
any moment and i'll be crazy.
*calms down*
haix... this is crazy.
Supermassive black hole IS a great song.
COOL beat and everything.
not too serious and blah, CERTAINLY NOT SOUL.
which is practically great. *evil*
you could say that im running and running,
but i could never get thin this way.
did DNT,
but ended up sleeping.
wanwen disturb me when i sleeping. ;[
call me help her buy 595 de screen protector.
lazy go PP la.
some more sleeping -.-
woke up to eat dinner
which is redundant because i'm totally full up.
MASSAGE mum's shoulders cause she's having a major headache.
couldn't get F.I.R - fly off my lips.
BANAO is still rawks.
*admire*
SJH called and is being so irritating ...
STUPIDITY...
EVERYTHING IS SUCH A HORRENDOUS STUPIDITY IN MY EYES.
school, life, relationship and everything.
downright PESSIMISTIC.
i'm so gonna break every glass ball in my life,
and HOLD on tightly to the rubber ball which i know will not break,
but still i treasure it like fuck now. wth.
MY LIFE IS MESSED UP.
i've become a person that i myself hate.
i think about myself in everything i do.
i never gonna believe in love,
and think that it's stupidity to care for anyone because you'll only end up getting hurt.
it stupid to cry and get all emotionally over things and...
to feel, to breathe.
LIFE IS STUPIDITY.
everything is plain useless now.
all i wanna now is to get away from this wretched place and find myself back.
i freaking wanna break away.
I do not want to sleep cause i'm afraid to face another day.
I drink to suppress my feelings and thoughts, anger and sadness.
Mask... i'm sinking deep into hiding myself.
not just about myself, my feelings and thoughts and everything.
i used to be like that for a another reason,
but right now.. i feel life is just plain useless and there's no meaning to it.
wasn't exactly into suicidal,
just a living zombie.
NUMB.
i'm doing everything i could to keep myself numb.
cause it hurt, and i'm doing what i could to keep away from the source.
sleeps are still peaceful, but consciousness is my nightmare.
IN other words, i'm living in my nightmare.
NICE right. exactly. ;]
NEED TO SEEK CONSULTANT FROM JER,
definitely not someone who can manipulate my feelings whenever she feel like it.
well, and definitely you didn't know you could ;DDD
"BANAO IS SO NOT PLUCKING BRAINS. wth. ROFL" Labels: Emo, Hilarious, JER's conver
-xaryth.
BTW, FYI, this post is gonna be super long.
JER just simply said that BANAO is PLUCK BRAIN in Chinese, and that i was crazy to like something that pluck brain -.-"
HAD the worst of day today.
was late for school,
1/2 is probably of yesterday stuffs
and 1/2 WAS REGINA FAULT.
DAMN! we were made to sing national anthem with out the song.
GAVE the DULAN face.
hand phone also nearly kana caught.
luckily i late before and i know where they check.
kept inside my pants de pocket, instead of uni.
BAD things happens in a chain.
after national anthem,
return to class,
Suraiya caught me taking a wine-flavoured sweet in class,
and pull-ed my ear.
my mood was so bad that i can't be bothered with her...
haix.
mr LEE was kind enough to ask me whether i'm okay. He's a nice teacher. Drew dragon in class and refuses to do my work. wayne was like DESTROYINGGGGG MY OTHER DRAWING that i drew yesterday. Hop around again. Don't feel like going nad's house tmr; they doing DNT tgt. i think i'll DEExiao qiqi tmr ;D i realised that my friends are there, just whether i want to or not. RECESSSSS, i ate chicken chop slowlyyyy... 1st time eat until unappetising. didn't sit with ahmin, sat alone. but ask shao and co to come acc me.
Currently deleting all msges,
inbox outbox,
except for jie's and jer's.
it makes my com go crazy just now
the sum of msges going 1k -.-
no wonder my phone so lag.
i feel like writing a novel.
i think it will make me feel better.
came home and slept for 4hours. woke up with a headache. my bolster is the best comfort i could get. hugging it in all sorts of way, HEY! 不要想歪歪. Msn could not log in. and when i finally do, jie isn't online. AND i realised that i've deleted everyone's msg except for 3 person. you should know who are they...
14 of feb is appreciation day,
AND OFCOURSE, VALENTINE'S day.
my school is treats it like friendship day.
lalala, idk what to buy for my mortal....
OHHHH, anyoneeeee can tell me where can i buy glass balls??
my plans have no change in it, except what to give.
I WANNNNNA CHIONG FINISH DNT THIS WEEK END. and do survey by next. SURVEY GONNA BE SO FUN ;DDDD i wanna forget everything that had happened. shimin ask me why i initiated when it's so dear to me... i dunno how to reply. LIKE VIV said, we shouldn't met at all. OKAY NOWWWW FOR THE CONVERS, obviously jer's, no point writing the other one.
me; jer, why you can be alone and you dun mind it?
jer; why suddenly ask such a scary question?
erm is it that scary? o-o....
me; it's scary?
jer; erm.. change word. weird.
me; idk what to change to. i mean exactly that.
jer; what made u suddenly ask it?
me; i'm not used to being alone. though it doesn't seem like i'm alone... it's weird to not have a clique.
well, i intended to call viv,say this and about sat. but she was in choir and didnt answer. she told me i should go do hwk. and TADAH, NO MOOD DO LE. ;[
jer; Though it doesnt seem like you are alone?-means you got people with you but still feel alone or..? And,you don't need a clique to feel not alone. It isnt wierd to not have a clique. You are just not used to it that's all. Don't you have people whom you hang out with?
me; it's weird. ;] haha like i said i'm not used to it. it's not exactly a clique so to speak. it's the sense of knowing that your not alone and someone is there no matter what happens. like things will not change. But all i know is unstablity which makes me scared.
... blah blah blah, then she nag me again ....
OH was quarreling with viv at the same time.
seriously idk how i did it -.-
i didnt tell jer.
we chatted about .. LEONG HOR FUN ALMOST GETTING KICKED IN THE FACE.
her ccaaaa, and angel and mortal thingy.
me; EH EH, Tell me whose your mortal ;D
jer; *gags* don't ask. it isn't someone many fancy in our class including me.
me; Oo who leh? Liang ah? i heard jh say he's disliked many in 4J.
jer; =.=" he is'nt disliked by many and me. Don't ask laaa. It's so sway and I'm still fussing on what i should do over it.
me; your class guys are weird. dunno duncare liao la. ROFL. maybe u could be nice and just say happy valentine day to him.
jer;Isn't it supposed to be appreciation?
And my class the guys arn't wierd. They just are abit diff from other classes barhs..but still, they
are fun to disturb: D
me; same la. stupid school treat until like friendship day.
jer; Too young for valentines. Thus comes the appreciation.
me; EXCUSES LA.
jer; Different people think differently. Besides,almost alot of people in our school treat it as valentines day.
me; yupp ;] lalala majority wins.
jer; =.=" dots.. Not sleeping any sooner?
me; need do hwk also. ;[ T.T lead the hwk i habven do. eh woman, remember to bring thesarus. later u get scolding again.
jer; Lols.English one? Don't worry. I'll remember to bring one; after today's ordeal. : )
.... got too tired to do homework. BAD mood la... KNN CCB. i threw my amaths textbook into dustbin and sat on bed....
me; JER, can i not care about anything and get chase out by Suraiya tmr, and sleep outside of the class? i no mood to do anything.
jer; Smiles sweetly at you and says "no". : ) why? What happen to you today?
me; that's sarcasium! tired and just broke up with a friend. lalala, disappointment suck big time.
jer; Sarcasm. Try to patch up with her la. Baka. After all, you guys are in same class. Can't be enemies forever right?
Mmm..acks..first period. Think you can complete during reading time if you today really cannot?
... SEE MY SPELLING STILL SUCK, and blah blah blah i told my reasons...
jer; Oh..ever wonder what made her that way? Or, was she like that before she went there? Let's see..if you've have not started on english, than, what have you been doing all along?
me; Amaths, maths and moreeee MATHS. -.- jie said that she's plain selfish, but i didnt really care but there's till a point where i could not fork out anymore.... i've my limits too. i think sagitaruses really clashes with my horo. IT SCARES ME TO HAVE SO MANY SAGIs in my class, HAHA. disappointed suck big time and i can't risk having more of that comming, yeah now i'm selfish ;D. to think she forgot about sat. oh btw, she not my classmate. what makes u think that she is?
jer;I dunno. Should'nt it be? Everybody gets disappointed once in a while. Shouldn't let the phrase once bitten twice shy get into you.
My reply may be a lil slow so pardon me. I'm in the mood of doing stupid things.
me; like drink right? liqour flavoured sweets are nice. which reminds me that i have one. ;] you must be tired liao. i'm not disapointed once okay? LALALA.
jer; Nononono. Only stupid dao cannot stupid de people will then drink or eat anything related to alcohol. You must learn this phrase then- always bitten never shy =D
me; ;O THAT'S CALL BU YAO LIAN. no seriously liquor flavoured sweets are nice, they have the taste but not the alcohol. ;]
jer; Wei wei. English-can complete by today ma?
me; FINEE FINE. I'LL DO. BANAO IS SOOOOO CUTEEE. I should get u attracted to it too. ;]
jer; Learn to be what's it again? Bu yao lian? Then. And, you are the nuts. Who would love the...banao? Wierd name. Sounds like pluck your brain in chinese =D
Jy in doing. I also gonna complete my stupid stuffs liao.
me; OMG you're so gonna be the death of me. ROFL. what pluck your brain. BANAO is a nervous and very busy RICH banana. SUPER CUTE LO. what is the stupid thing u doing.
jer; BANANA IN PAJAMAS!~ Are jumping off the bed~
Crazy.who would love a stupid banana except kids? Oh. And correction. Banana has no nerves. That's why it cannot be nervous and we can eat it wo it screaming ah every time we bite into it. I'm gonna complete liao. Show it to you when i'm done later. =D
me; hehe; it's KAWAII. lalala i bring a sweet for u to try tmr. ;]
jer; Dunno. Don't give a damn. Bananas are never cute. See no point in gushing over that..bunao. Pluck your brain pluck your brain~ Ehs? That's what's its doing to you. Plucking your brain along with the sensors out. Such that you think that's cute. =D problem sloved! Thank you but no thanks. I've kinda had enough of sweets. Bi jiao and esp. emily always loves to bring sweets to school.
... CRAZYNESS. WTH HAHAHHAHAA... ;DDD
jie; Let go of it then. Ah. Some people just dunno how to treasure what they got. Since u made da decision le, just rmb got jie support mei.
me; ya like support me to drink. ;DD
jie; Nights. Support you drink?! Lidat jue jiao 2? Sweet dream. Take care. Have fun tmr
ok ... off with the crazyness, i went to bed after that.
" Try not maybe i should use a harsher word. Don't step into the path of being alone. I'm sure that you have many people out there who cares for youAnd whom you can really click with. Not everyone is the same-some may disappoint you but some may not in the end at all.So, don't shun away when given opportunaties. Just grab then when they come. It may be good for you.I'm writiting this on impulse and i don't know why.Sleep early. 8) "
"Get people like your jie those kind. Their very good and nice people. =)"
- Jermain chu.
ps/ jie u must be honoured.
ps// i'm ... TIRED. ;[ took hours to write this post.
HAPPY KEITHY(COW;BEEFY;NEW)YEAR EVERYONEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! Labels: crazy day, Daily Tots, Emo, PIL
on the 25th of jan,
i went out with icy and shao.
kinda x.x
cause was feeling sick sia.
headacheeeeee.
we lunched and walked through china town street.
SAW A LOT OF THINGS I WANNA BUY,
sadly i had no money with meee,
neither do i had any at home. ;[
bought a cute lil piggy,
ICY bought cute badges.
u never want to know what it is ROFL.
I WANT THAT DRUM SET A LOT....
nvm, i'll get it some other time ;]
Surprisingly early,
we spilt our routes at 2pm.
i wanted to go home,
icy meeting friend,
idk what shao is doing.
reached home bathed and went out again. ;[ ate tuan yuan fan (reunion dinner).okay i still owe that SURAIYA homework. haix whatever, i'll do all 4 intro tmr. procastination huh? ;[ tuan yuan fan is stupid. everyyear it had been stupid. i hate going to gran's house. like garbage dump like that.but gran's a nice person. T-T even if we are being utterly disrespectful during granddad funeral, she didnt scold us. deep down inside we all know we are wrong. i dunno if the food are edible or not under such a condition but still i ate out of respect. mum hardly eat anything. just sat there and cook the food. LOL. amazing huh? ;D
when we reached home. i was so sick that i couldnt speak at all. kept coughing and coughing. cleared the table and stick my mini whiteboard somewhere.
mum bought in the cough medi for me, and said she will take it out after she bathe. when i finally cleared my table everythinggggg, and tuck myself into bed she came into room and insisted that i sleep on my tweetybird pillow. only did i realised that she hadddd stuffed an angbao inside. -.- MONEY IS NOT NICE TO DREAM OFF. I HATE MONEY MATTERS ;D but... i didnt sleep on that pillow anyways. ;DDD i've forgotten what i dreamt of, but i remember very well what i dreamt of the previous night. and i want it to go on forever and ever andd well i know i'll wake up. -.-
anywaysssss...
on 26th of jan,
which is today,
woke up to 9 smses,
collected angbaos,
and went to unknown houses.
only a single clean house.
other's no diff from gran's.
i wouldnt bother posting pictures of gran's house ...only like 2 pictures of my cousins, which i dun talk to -.- hadn't got any pics of ting fang inside de. o.o
mum and dad is like always so .... doesnt mean we talk onceee need to likeeeeee be very close friends and talk everytime we meet worhs. me and bro dunno know what to say then never say lorh. THEIR CHILDHOOD IS WAYYYYYYYY OUT OF OUR IMAGINATIONS ;X not that we have weak imaginations, but we dun think thats possible so had put off the idea.
gave mum 60dollars off my angbao money,
and the 30 i took is for the valentine pressie.
with the 20 i took from my wallet off this week's allowence,
i had only 50 to spare.
idk whether it's enough or not.
BUT nvm, YOU GUYSSSSS MUST LOVE IT OKAY.
I DUN CARE. T-T esp viv. or i kill you.
*takes out a chopper*
had steamboat again, on our own, at home. i think im gonna eat sick of steamboat and not hold an outing for steamboat le. maybe a smelly tofu competition would be COOOL. ill be eating steamboat at AUNT'S house tmr. which leaves me no time for DNT. crap, but i chose to use my time to blog. wth. CRAP, suraiya will kick me outa class. nvm i no mood study also, makes no difference. I'VE BEGAN PROCASTINATION. DDDDD;
i'll leave this part to the last.
[[ Been feeling pretty lonely this year,
even though i'm not showing it much.
when i was heading to gran's house with car,
i kinda... teared. ;x
nobody kinda notice
cause everyone knows that i have a flu going on.
i doubt anyone knows the real reason
how i got it.
it wasnt some 'i caught a flu' thing.
i remembered a sentence.
' you chose our division. '
something like that.
i fought back my thoughts.
debated with myself.
and gave up thinking.
it's very true of what ariel had said.
i've nth to say.
close friends.
i doubt i know the meaning of that.
but i think i had a few good friends,
but 'close' ?
not quite match the meaning of it.
i'm just starting to learn things that i had not from pri2 till now.
and for a moment when i walked back to the car,
when we finally decided to go back home...
i kinda felt i needed someone new in my life.
a desire so strong that even dreams portrays images of it.]]
okay, i've make up my mind.
i'll just leave things as it is.
whether we drift apart or what,
it's up to you to control.
just so you know,
i'm a person who...
you couldnt say that feelings faded or whatever shit.
cause to me, it's like... no matter how long never talk, if nth bad happens inbetween, i'm all the same as the last time we met.
this is ME for you.
now that you know me very well, dun ever say u don't know me anymore.
would u still be friends with me??
- to viv.
ps// i know you wouldnt come to my blog anymore. but i just leave things here for u to see, when u come.
ONCE a wrong decision is made and everything just crumbles after it. i'm throughly done with you. - xAryth
YESTERDAYYYY.
early in the morning went out to meet ICY.
met NOOOBIE for the 1st time.
she was so quiet lorh.
will she couldnt speak chinese, so our convers kinda left her out.
SORRIES T------T
trasher and the others came pretty late.
Lunched at yoshi,
and checked out cold storage.
VODKAAAAAS. ;D
anybody can buy me somemore?
ANYWAYS,
COLD STORAGE SELLS OVERPRICED BARCADY BREEZERS.
DON'T BUY FROM THERE.
it's like 6 dollars at coldstorage,
and 4.50 at NTUC.
SEE THE 1.50 difference??
a lot sia.
we run from one place to another...
just to buy vodkas and sparkling juice.
lame right??
but nevermind. ;DD
BOUGHTTTT OUR FILL.
and went to ICY's house.
trashie went to find her friend. ;]
ICY's house is like M-I-L-L-I-O-N-S of kiloMETERS away from the MRT STATION.
i scared witchy, noobie and SHAO de make up melt sia.
i think because not many have ezlink with them thats why didnt take bus.
BBQ was fun,
very successful.
played poker cards
and drink the vodka and sparkling juice we bought.
catched up on each other and everything. ;D
but when we go buy charcoal,
viv called.
she cried.
heartbreak... to hear her cry.
anyways she will be comming back on the 28th.
I MISSSSSSS YOU TOOs. mismismismismismismis.
i left icy's house at 11:46pm 16mins before my birthday.
i dun wan to go de.
i want to wait countdown de.
THEN MY BROTHER THERE BUGGING ME GO.
say what if i dun go he go back 1st.
OFCOURSE IF HE GO BACK ALONE,
mum sure ask and blame me de right??
wahlao.
then he give me the fuck up face and attitude lorh.
walk his own way.
HE KNOW THAT I CANNOT CONTACT HIM cause his phone no credit.
annoying person.
MAKE ME SO SAD ON MY BDAY.
what shit ma.
anyways over it le.
put that case aside thanks to TRASHIE and JER.
though that chaolao person keep support him.
nvm lorhhhh lalalala.
slept near 4am in the morning.
was CRAPING WITH JIAMIN, BULLYING JER.
TODAY
woke at 7am.
go reply jermain cause i fell asleep.
FELT AS MY BODY WAS HARDEN OVER NIGHT.
go disturb TRASHIE early in the morninggggggg. ;DDD
spam spam spam till like 10am before i started going to bathe and everything.
we are meeting at like 1030am
lol. i was freaking late.
SORRIES TRASHIE I ALWAYS LATE.
she waited for me at guardian while eating seaweed.
we were both very hungry,
so breaunch-ed before going to shop.
SHOP FOR LIKEEEEEEE 2 HOURS PLUS didnt find anything.
OH OH WE SAWWWWW WITCH AT BUGISSS.
she was like '' GIVE YOUUUU XMAS KISS''
ytd give de is '' BIRTHDAY KISS''
L-O-L-ED.
TRASHIIIIIIE BOUGHT ME A RINGGG!!!!!
lol ofcourse, i choose de then she just buy for present sake la.
okay whatever,
couldnt find any present then,
in the end i went to buy 2 box of choco then was 1/2 hour late again.
BRA WENT MISSINGGGGGGG!!!!! BRYAN LA. think till where huh???
finally came.
went vivo.
slacked.
didnt watch movie.
i want to watch - bed time stories.
miss jer telling me story.
though like 2 times only.
LOL.
okay, must forget such stuffs.
fan zheng ... ... you know what. ;x
eat subway 6 incher.
home-ed soon.
eat steamboat with mum.
watch lil nonya
and sing bday song
and eaet CAKES.
omg i told trasher i eat till morning since i so happy.
but i eat 3 pieces want to puke le.
i have 3 cakes this year.
one from aunt.
one from MUMMMM, she buy from polarrrrr - WOAHHHH-
LAST BUT NOT LEAST.
- WIPE TEARS -
FROM VERRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!
she bakeeeeee one for me siaaa.
IT'S LIKE OMGGG, IM SO TOUCHED TOUCHED TOUCHED.
CRIES....
happy, hyper, jump jump, run about, bang into wall.
everytime someone precious to me de bday, i want to bake cake
GUESS WHAT, STUPID OVEN DUN WORK.
must make papa repair everything. ;[
I'm GONNA LOVEEEEEE YOU, VERRRRRRR. LOL jking. ;D
anyways...
WAYNE SAY HE GONNA GIVE ME 40 PERCENT DE VODKAAAA.
THOUGH LIKE 1/4 drank.
OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. happy. FLOATS.
i very exhausted right now....
dieing...
GONNA POST LIAO.
wait ...
wait...
a fewmore enters and craps.
.. I MISS VIVIAN YUEN XIAO TONGGGGG.
AND I'VE DECIDED TO CALL HER XIAOTONG MAKE HER PISSED. hahahhaha
SARANG HAEEEEEEE EVERYONE.
thanks ah jer and qi go out with me today.
thought that you wouldnt but you did anyways.
that was enough. ;D
TRASHIEEEEEE I LOVEEEEEE YOU. ;D
the ring rules kays.
WAYNEY I WANT VODKAAA.
i hope i dun die
VERRR, SERIOUSLY YOU ROCK MY SOCKS.
though they kinda in washing machine now.
BRO ATE THE WHOLE CAKE.
next time bake me somemore.
i'll make you something niceeeee for you bday.
who knows when must tell me!!!
PS/ TODAY IS CRAZY
Labels: Daily Tots, EmoEMO.
is the only word
i could find to describe
now.
well viv left for ipoh today.
i was ultra tired when she woke me up today.
hais.
but we chatted anyways.
when i finally got up and bathe,
& prepare for work,
she was leaving sg le.
so we stopped smsing.
i didn't talk much the entire day.
no, i only talked when people asked me questions.
i was too busy concentrating on what to think and what not to think.
the same thoughts had already been preoccupying my entire mind,
and leaving me sleepless nights for the past week.
DESPERATELY GASPING FOR AIR,
CHOKING MYSELF IN MY THOUGHTS.
i read twilight to distract myself.
but it didn't work for a long term.
got scolded at work in the afternoon.
a customer kept changing her mind,
so i kept canceling,
making the whole receipt messy.
THEN BOSS STARED AT ME.
die liao lorh.
got a few times is my partner calculate wrong de,
i think i got blamed for that too.
sweet. -.-
so they are going to change my duty.
how great....
whatever.
packed up and headed home after work.
it was a long ride from siglap to punggol.
took bus 87 & 62.
i didn't take out my book.
it was freezing cold in the bus,
but i just let it come.
it was painfully cold.
but i wasn't in the mood to be bothered with that.
i just kept looking out,
trying to block out thoughts.
i was effing tired when i finally reached home.
went to bed immediately.
i think i was about to get sick.
or more of emotionally sick.
slept till 930 Then i wake.
mum was already back from m'sia with dad.
it was her birthday today.
i came out to charge my phone.
& put up a smile so the celebration could go on.
whatever ... i feel so weak now.
Si liang told me Chaos had made FTB blacklisted by making a FTB de char & went challenging AWE's leader. great... -.- but Jiamin is handling the case currently. so yeah, happy that i didn't need to do much. Thanks a lot JM.
ps// my mood is sibei jialat. & it just got worse ...
Labels: Daily Tots, Emo, PIL
So.. i asked vivian
"viv, where do i stand? 'cause currently i feel that i like treading on water trying very hard not to drown in it."
& she couldn't give me an answer with a straight meaning to it.
honestly, i was feeling very sad about it.
But i thought it through,
& i realised that almost everyone is the same.
& blame it on the word have that much meaning to it. HMPH!!!
AN ADDITIONAL POINT TO POINT OUT ABOUT "LOVE"
Love is a feeling of missing someone, wanting to be with that person so on and so fro, even if u had a big quarrel or anything of such.
it's like it doesn't matter if both of u quarrel or fight or anything, because after that incident, you will be missing that person even if u didnt talk for months, days or even years.
that feeling just dun change, even if someone reminded you of the person u used to love, still you would want to meeet him holding even a lil bit of that feeling u once had.
That Feeling only weaken due to time but it will never be entirly gone (unless you really hate that person to the core because he did something so wrong to u, & the mention of the person name will make u wan to murder him.)
for example, a MAN abusing his wife. not many people will stand that circumstances & will immeadiatly file for divorce ( obviously a era like now ) but that wife loves her husband and decided to endure with it.
& IF UR THINKING IM SAYING THE GUY IS RIGHT, NO HE'S NOT. that guy obviously making use of his wife, so on and so fro. no, he doesn't love her. because as compared to the quarreling couple, both of them love each other and think for the other's feeling after the quarrel or wan to make up for it. BUTTTT ABUSEEE ... IS OBVIOUSLY constantly.
SO.. see the difference now?
i realised that LOVE, is just like that.
because there will be a lot of people entering and leaving ur life,
making your heart skip following by crushes so on and so fro,
during ur entire lifespan.
NOT very often that there's 2 people who can last long enough together the whole life,
which is why Divorce's Agency is making so much money now,
& ROM is getting very busy with fussy people who can't make up their mind.
p.s/ MY HEART WILL NOT CHANGE EVEN IF TIME IS iNFiNiTY, 'cause in that lil pumping thing lives a YOU that only i know, whom i love dearly.
